Sunday, February 23, 2014

Review: The Chaos of Stars by Kiersten White

Oh, "Chaos of Stars" I wanted to love you so badly. You promised humor! And adventure! And Egyptian mythology! All the fun stuff!
What I got was instead an insufferable main character, a doormat of a love interest and a hole-filled plot that didn't rear its ugly head until the last 20% of the novel. 
Isadora, the female lead, is the human daughter of egyptian deities Isis and Osiris. She spends a blissful childhood, decorating, amongst other things, a special room her parents selected for her. This until she finds out that she is mortal and that the room she has been lovingly decorating is, in fact, her future tomb.
Osiris and and Isis have a human child every twenty years because the gods need worshippers in order to remain in physical form. When Isadora finds out about this, she thinks her parents see her only as a mean to an end and becomes determined to leave Egypt for good as soon as she can.
At sixteen, Isadora is bitter and frustrated, and the presence of her older, immortal brother Horus and his wife, Hathor, both of whom often call her by the wrong name doesn't help matters. 
So when Isis feels chaos rising and decides to get pregnant early, Isadora sizes the opportunity to convince her parents to let her stay for a couple of months with her older brother Sirus, in America.
From that moment on until the last 20%, the novel consists of Isadora sulking, eating, proving that she is better than anyone else, eating, being an ass, eating, somehow managing to make friends. Not to mention lots and lots of sexual tension with doormat boy. Yay!
I found Isadora to be sympathetic at first, because the situation she was in was truly awful. It didn't last long. She is an immature, selfish Mary Sue. She has a sense of humor only eight graders should be justified to get away with. She calls Horus "Whore-us" for the entire novel. Yep. That's her idea of a sophisticated joke, guys.
Her first reaction upon finding out that her brother is married and that he and his wife, Deena, are expecting a child is feeling betrayed. Understandable enough, right? Her brother kept an important part of his life from her, after all. But nope, the not telling her part comes as an afterthought. What makes her angry is the simple fact that he got married. How dare her brother try and be as happy as he can?
But see, Isadora heartily disapproves of romantic relationships. Why? Because there's no point, because they either end or one of the lovers die. She's the life of the party, this one. 
Oddly enough, she doesn't have the same problems with friendships, even though those have to end too, and friends have the potential to hurt you just as much as lovers can.
But I think we all know why Isadora is ok with friendship but not ok with romance: the author needed an excuse for Isadora to rebuff doormat boy (ok, his name is Ry, short for Orion. Guess who is obsessed with stars and has elected Orion as her favorite constellation? This book couldn't get cheesier if it tried), but still remain in contact with him throughout the novel, so as to give the reader the right amount of breathtaking (ha!) sexual tension.
Isadora and Ry are clearly meant for each other. Why? Because they are so breathtakingly gorgeous that they cannot go anywhere without being hit on!
Also, Isadora is talented! And artistic! She is an interior designer (mind you, do not call her an interior decorator, or she'll get testy) and an incredibly good one. So good that she gets to redesign a whole room in the museum she volunteers in all on her own. So good that Ry's mother immediately refurnishes one of the rooms of her house according to her instruction. 
Isadora is gifted not only with a beautiful face and statuesque figure, but also with the knowledge of every language ever spoken. 
Isadora is a dick. When she meets Ry, he talks to her in Arabic, to make her feel at home. Does Isadora appreciate the gesture? Nope! She gets offended because she assumes he thinks she doesn't speak English well. 
At one point, Ry takes her hand, even though she had made it clear she didn't want a relationship. She has a right to get upset. But there's understandably upset and then there's hyper-reacting. And then there's Isadora. She fucking bolts out of the door as she, Ry and their two friends are watching a movie and freaking turns her phone off because she doesn't want to give Ry the possibility to explain.
"I'm so tired of all these girls throwing themselves at me, I just want to sit in a corner and write epic poetry in peace." said (and meant) no teenage boy ever Ry (he didn't quite put it like that, but that was the gist of it). 
The romance is boring and unbelievable. Ry's reasons for loving Isadora are flimsy at best and downright unbelievable at worst, and Isadora might be in lust with him, but she is far to ready to put him in the line of danger for me to buy her supposed love for him. 
Tyler and Scott, Isadora's friends, are far more likable and interesting than the main couple. I can't help but wish that the book had been about them, even though there isn't a drop of godly blood in either of them. 
So yeah, this book was a huge disappointment. My advice for you is to spend you time and money on some worthier novel.  
Rating: 




5 comments:

  1. Oh wow and the book cover looks just as amazing too! I really like Egyptian mythology too, can you recommend any other books with this theme, that don't suck?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "The Clockwork Scarab" doesn't have Egyptian gods in it, but it deals with aspects of Egyptian mythology and it's a really enjoyable book

      Delete
  2. Ooh... Okay, Never mind. *Deletes from To-Read Shelf* And the cover was so intriguing! I love your blog by the way!

    Carissa Bookwyrm ~ The Bookworm Insider
    http://thebookworminsider.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL. At the very least, your review was ridiculously entertaining! I've had a copy of this for ages and just have never felt like picking it up, even though I love Egyptian mythology and the cover is gorgeous. Meh. I guess that intuition was right.

    They all can't be winners, I guess. Great review, though! :)
    Rachel @ Paper Cuts

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Sofia! I came across your blog through goodreads, so I figured to stop by and say hi! I am now following you through bloglovin btw :)

    Wow, this one really had a great premise, beautiful cover art, and overall original sounding plot. It's a shame it was ruined by a very irritating main character! Your review is really great, thorough, with plenty of examples as to why this book just didn't work. Isadora sounds like a brat and completely overreacts over simple things. Thanks for the heads up. I'll be skipping this one!

    Anyway, feel free to stop by my blog sometime. Always looking for new blogger buddies to chat with :)

    Best Wishes,
    Mia @ The Muses Circle

    ReplyDelete